robconroy
September 8th, 2005, 15:16
Another oldie that I'm sure you all know.
This used to be my party piece when I'd had a bit too much. Dodgy accent & all.
The Story of Pierre, Ze Famous French Fighter Pilot<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
<?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Pierre</st1:place></st1:City> was on leave after a particularly gruelling tour of duty Over Flanders Fields. He’d been shot down by The Red Baron again, the third time in a row, which was tiresome. The CO was muttering darkly about charging his new Nieuport to his pay account. He needed some more convivial company than the rather aloof Rosbifs of the RFC who were sharing his squadron’s Officers Mess.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
So off he went to his home town to visit his sweetheart, who he’d not seen for nearly a year.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
When <st1:place w:st="on"><st1:City w:st="on">Pierre</st1:City></st1:place> called on her & was shown into the parlour he was pleasantly surprised. The sweet young girl he’d left behind had blossomed, into a beautiful young woman, a lovely peach, ripe for the picking so to speak.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Now, Pierre was a handsome young man, & looked extremely dashing in his Pilots uniform & white silk flying scarf, with his Legion d’Honneur seemingly casually pinned to his tunic, so it was no surprise that, when he invited the mademoiselle to the pretty glade near to the stream where they used to kiss & hold hands, for un picnic, she said “Oui” very quickly.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
<st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Pierre</st1:place></st1:City> had not been entirely faithful whilst posted, and had in fact learnt some very interesting lessons on his frequent trips in to town with his comrades, to a certain bar with some very friendly “waitresses”. He fully intended to put some of those lessons to good use.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
The next day, <st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Pierre</st1:place></st1:City> had managed to procure a wonderful feast, with Fois Gras, Oysters, wine & cognac & the like. When they had finished the food & drank some wine (a little more than his sweetheart was used to, actually) she turned to <st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Pierre</st1:place></st1:City> & breathed gently, “Oh, Mon Cherie, it has been so long, kiss me!”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
<st1:place w:st="on"><st1:City w:st="on">Pierre</st1:City></st1:place> took a glass of red wine & gently dripped some over her lips & kissed her passionately.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
His Sweetheart found this very pleasant indeed & said “Oh, my darling that was exquisite, but why the red wine?”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
“I am Pierre, Ze Famous French Fighter Pilot, & when I eat red meat, I drink red wine.”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
She breathed, a little harder this time, whilst unbuttoning the top of her dress,”Kiss me lower”.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
So <st1:place w:st="on"><st1:City w:st="on">Pierre</st1:City></st1:place> took a glass of white wine, which had been chilling in the stream, & poured a little over her heaving breasts, and kissed them passionately.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
“Oh Darling, that was even better, but why the white wine?”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
“I am Pierre, Ze Famous French Fighter Pilot, & when I eat white meat, I drink white wine.”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Then she panted, as she removed her dress, “Kiss me lower!”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
So <st1:City w:st="on">Pierre</st1:City> took a glass of <st1:City w:st="on">Cognac</st1:City>, poured it over her nether regions, struck a match & set light to the <st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Cognac</st1:place></st1:City>!<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
The poor girl leapt into the stream to extinguish herself & cried” Mon Dieu, you maniac, why did you do that!”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
“I am Pierre, Ze Famous French Fighter Pilot, and when I go down, I go down in flames!”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> :gameoff:</o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
This used to be my party piece when I'd had a bit too much. Dodgy accent & all.
The Story of Pierre, Ze Famous French Fighter Pilot<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
<?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Pierre</st1:place></st1:City> was on leave after a particularly gruelling tour of duty Over Flanders Fields. He’d been shot down by The Red Baron again, the third time in a row, which was tiresome. The CO was muttering darkly about charging his new Nieuport to his pay account. He needed some more convivial company than the rather aloof Rosbifs of the RFC who were sharing his squadron’s Officers Mess.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
So off he went to his home town to visit his sweetheart, who he’d not seen for nearly a year.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
When <st1:place w:st="on"><st1:City w:st="on">Pierre</st1:City></st1:place> called on her & was shown into the parlour he was pleasantly surprised. The sweet young girl he’d left behind had blossomed, into a beautiful young woman, a lovely peach, ripe for the picking so to speak.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Now, Pierre was a handsome young man, & looked extremely dashing in his Pilots uniform & white silk flying scarf, with his Legion d’Honneur seemingly casually pinned to his tunic, so it was no surprise that, when he invited the mademoiselle to the pretty glade near to the stream where they used to kiss & hold hands, for un picnic, she said “Oui” very quickly.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
<st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Pierre</st1:place></st1:City> had not been entirely faithful whilst posted, and had in fact learnt some very interesting lessons on his frequent trips in to town with his comrades, to a certain bar with some very friendly “waitresses”. He fully intended to put some of those lessons to good use.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
The next day, <st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Pierre</st1:place></st1:City> had managed to procure a wonderful feast, with Fois Gras, Oysters, wine & cognac & the like. When they had finished the food & drank some wine (a little more than his sweetheart was used to, actually) she turned to <st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Pierre</st1:place></st1:City> & breathed gently, “Oh, Mon Cherie, it has been so long, kiss me!”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
<st1:place w:st="on"><st1:City w:st="on">Pierre</st1:City></st1:place> took a glass of red wine & gently dripped some over her lips & kissed her passionately.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
His Sweetheart found this very pleasant indeed & said “Oh, my darling that was exquisite, but why the red wine?”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
“I am Pierre, Ze Famous French Fighter Pilot, & when I eat red meat, I drink red wine.”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
She breathed, a little harder this time, whilst unbuttoning the top of her dress,”Kiss me lower”.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
So <st1:place w:st="on"><st1:City w:st="on">Pierre</st1:City></st1:place> took a glass of white wine, which had been chilling in the stream, & poured a little over her heaving breasts, and kissed them passionately.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
“Oh Darling, that was even better, but why the white wine?”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
“I am Pierre, Ze Famous French Fighter Pilot, & when I eat white meat, I drink white wine.”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Then she panted, as she removed her dress, “Kiss me lower!”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
So <st1:City w:st="on">Pierre</st1:City> took a glass of <st1:City w:st="on">Cognac</st1:City>, poured it over her nether regions, struck a match & set light to the <st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Cognac</st1:place></st1:City>!<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
The poor girl leapt into the stream to extinguish herself & cried” Mon Dieu, you maniac, why did you do that!”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
“I am Pierre, Ze Famous French Fighter Pilot, and when I go down, I go down in flames!”<o:p></o:p>
<o:p> :gameoff:</o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>