ThinkingManNeil
July 23rd, 2011, 11:59
The recession has hit everybody really hard...
• My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
• CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
• Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
• I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
• If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
• Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
• Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
• My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!
• A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
• When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
• The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
And, finally....
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call centre in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
Courtesy of The Galloping Beaver Blog (http://thegallopingbeaver.blogspot.com/)
N.
• My neighbor got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.
• CEO's are now playing miniature golf.
• Exxon-Mobil laid off 25 Congressmen.
• I saw a Mormon with only one wife.
• If the bank returns your check marked "Insufficient Funds," you call them and ask if they meant you or them.
• Angelina Jolie adopted a child from America.
• Parents in Beverly Hills fired their nannies and learned their children's names.
• My cousin had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!
• A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico.
• When Bill and Hillary travel together, they now have to share a room.
• The Treasure Island casino in Las Vegas is now managed by Somali pirates.
And, finally....
I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., I called the Suicide Hotline. I got a call centre in Pakistan, and when I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
Courtesy of The Galloping Beaver Blog (http://thegallopingbeaver.blogspot.com/)
N.